Friday, March 23, 2007

It's A Funny Old World

My site meter showed a recent visitor from Saudi Arabia (the first) the result of being directed there by a Google search for "Laura Bush vibrators"

Talking of dildos, Republican Representative Ralph Davenport seemingly wants South Carolina to join other states in the Global War on Vibrators.

A sex toy ban has already happened in Alabama, Georgia, Mississippi, and Texas. South Carolina could be next on that list.

But here I can't help but wonder, can you buy a gun in those states?

And not unnaturally some people asked the reasonable question and called Rep. Davenport to ask him the state purpose for such a law.

He said some constituents had asked him to introduce the bill, and he hoped that if someone is caught kidnapping someone and using these devices on an unwilling victim, that this would be another offense with which they could be charged.


Whoa boy,whoa whoa whoa, say that again.

if someone is caught kidnapping someone and using these devices on an unwilling victim,

Well Freud I ain't, but Jesus H, what is going on in this tiny suppressed little mind? If that little sentence alone doesn't set the alarm bells a ringing, the hooters a hooting and the whistles a whistling I don't know what will.

Un fucking believable that anybody could come out with such a statement, if that is what is in your head, what else is in there?. Lawdy lawdy

But Davenport, who professes not to know what a sex toy is (the hell you don't) also proposed this bill.

TO CREATE THE SOUTH CAROLINA UNBORN CHILDREN'S MONUMENT COMMISSION TO ERECT A MONUMENT ON THE STATE HOUSE GROUNDS AS A MEMORIAL TO SOUTH CAROLINA CHILDREN WHOSE LIVES ENDED BEFORE THEIR BIRTH


In the state house grounds this fellow wants to build a monument to a foetus! A nutcase you'd be thinking, a lone nutcase. Sorreee, there are thirty, yes thirty sponsors of this bill.
Now at this point I have to tell you, I'm struggling with this story, struggling inasmuch that I'm having a problem getting my head around the fact there are thirty grown up men and women that have put their names forward to endorse the building of a "Foetus for Jesus" monument, I'm struggling with it a great deal indeed.

I asked further up the page what was it that was going on in Davenport's head, well if you pop over to Pam's House Blend where she asks you to Look at Davenport's level of detail and research that obviously went into crafting this masterpiece of legislation.

So what conclusion can I reach about yer man Davenport, well for a man that don't know nuttin about sex toys, he knows a great deal about sex toys, and strangely enough an awful lot about all the Icky places that they might go.

I must stop this practice of getting up in the middle of the night for a cuppa (tea) it was never my intention to write this piece, not the first under similar circumstances, and I doubt the last.
So to round it off a couple of limericks that I dashed off at the time.


All us girls down South Caroline,
Scrub at sin 'till we do shine.
But to take away,
So we can't play.
Don't you dare it's mine mine mine.


My Daddy has asked me to,
Keep myself so pure and true.
But my little toy,
Gives so much joy.
Bet it knows much more than you.

Update:
(2) 'patently offensive' means obviously and clearly disagreeable, objectionable, repugnant, displeasing, distasteful, or obnoxious to contemporary standards of decency and propriety within the community.

(3) 'prurient interest' means a shameful or morbid interest in nudity, sex, or excretion and is reflective of an arousal of lewd and lascivious desires and thoughts.

I think this must be Davenport's way of saying it's worth watching.

Which only leaves me only to say: Only In America.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

What the hell??!!??!! I had not heard of this previously. This had better not come to Ohio or I am getting the hell out of dodge. They take away my rights, spy on me, send my countrymen to be slaughtered, and now they want to take my vibrator. I bet they are not going to outlaw penis pumps! After all those are a "medical" necessity. Just like viagra, which is covered by health insurance, but birth control is not. Any idiot with a penis can get the aid to allow him to impregnate as many women as he can, but the women do not have the means to prevent this. Absolutely unjustifiable. We have the right to vote, and I guess they think this is good enough. Fair and equal treatment be damned. I can not stand these sexually repressed, jesus loving, nitwits!! HH

Himself said...

That dude has some very serious problems and unfortunately he is far from alone, just a few tens of millions of others who have a problem with icky things.
I can't help but think there is a budding Ted Haggard in him or the ex Mayor of Spokane, can't remember his name, but whatever, this kind of guy is ripe for big scandal stuff, probably had a woody all the way through the issue.
I don't know about Ohio, last I heard they were discussing a ban on spin cycles. :-)