Rude Pundit's Ribald Rudery

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Rude Pundit's Ribald Rudery

The Inimitable Descriptions Of The Rude Pundit

Match The Person To the Description

A Quiz

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1 Better than midget porn, ??? detained at Palm Beach airport.

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Tom DeLay

Hugo Chavez

Rush Limbaugh

Osama bin Laden

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2 Back in middle school, ??? was masturbating constantly, moving from fumbling random jerker to expert pecker caresser.

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Scooter Libby

George Bush

Tucker Carlson

Kermit the frog

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3 ??? is still hard though, he goes over to Rove and tries to ass fuck the Texan. "Whoa, whoa," Rove says, stepping away, "Get the fuck off me.I'm no fag." ???, embarrassed, zips himself up.

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Ken Mehlman

Mark Foley

Joe Leiberman

Ann Coulter

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4 Attended by a slithering visage of the globule of evil that forms itself into a vaguely human form every now and again that is ???

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Karl Rove

Don Rumsfeld

Dick Cheney

Desmond Tutu

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5 This was just before Juan Williams, looking on in disgust at the tumescent cock of ???, about to spray a concupiscent Chris Wallace with neocon jizz.

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Stephen Hadley

Paul Wolfowitz

Bill Kristol

Jon Coyners

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6 Yep, in ??? untrained teachers use tax dollars to "teach" Christian belief and nutzoid fundamentalist bullshit.

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Texas

South Dakota

Kansas

Tehran

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7 These actions caused ??? to remove Bush's balls from his mouth long enough to say,

Joe Leiberman

Joe Leiberman

Joe Leiberman

Jim Webb

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8 So fuck ??? just another tiny-dicked fucker who abused his power and position in obeisance to a sublimated libido that Republican politics would not allow to run rampant and free.

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Randy Cunningham

Mark Foley

Tom DeLay

Big Dog

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9 Most people aren't paying attention, and when they turn on CNN or Fox, no ones telling them that ??? rapes hobo corpses after beating them to death with beagle puppies.

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Sam Alito

Dick Cheney

Bill Frist

Steve Irwin (RIP)

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10 ???, that strange, sad little man who fucks for money but refuses to call himself a "whore" Said, "Frankly I'd prefer to spend our time figuring out ways to bring this very important program of surveillance of potential terrorists here in the United States under the law.

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Joe Leiberman

Joe Leiberman

Joe Leiberman

Nelson Mandella

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11 If any Conservative mongers of cock want to try and defend ??? "Fucking liar" ??? and Fox "News" for its sneak attack on Bill Clinton.

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Neil Cavuto

Shaun Hannity

Chris Wallace

Keith Olberman

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12 Watching ??? "Behold my lipless shit-eating grin".......

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"Cod Piece" Matthews

"Manly Man" Matthews

"Sunny Nobility" Mathews

Lou Dobbs

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13 He's like an adolescent boy who just discovered that jacking off makes him feel good, so he's gonna thwack his dick as often as he can get it up.

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George Bush

Bill O'Reilly

Bill Kristol

Hugh Hefner

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14 "I'm psycho about queers" ??? craw this week is constant faggoty faggots faggoting up the place. I his letter to the super-duper prayer team.

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Tony Perkins

James Dobson

Pat Robertson

Liberace

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15 Which of course, leaves out ??? who's only purpose on earth seems to be keeping big pharma in business.

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Bill Frist

Rick Santorum

Rush Limbaugh

Hippocrates

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Answers Here. Score one for every correct answer.

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13 to 15. You know your rude stuff, but you should really get a life.

10 to 12. Fair play to you.

7 to 9. You must have a life, but quite reasonable.

4 to 6. You definitely have a life.

0 to 3. How sad.

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I shall call this the first quiz of two, but in truth there is enough material for a weekly column.

But the next one won't be as polite.
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