Monday, January 22, 2007

Rude Pundit's Ribald Rudery

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Rude Pundit's Ribald Rudery
The Inimitable Descriptions Of The Rude Pundit
Match The Person To the Description
A Quiz
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1 Better than midget porn, ??? detained at Palm Beach airport.
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Tom DeLay
Hugo Chavez
Rush Limbaugh
Osama bin Laden
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2 Back in middle school, ??? was masturbating constantly, moving from fumbling random jerker to expert pecker caresser.
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Scooter Libby
George Bush
Tucker Carlson
Kermit the frog
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3 ??? is still hard though, he goes over to Rove and tries to ass fuck the Texan. "Whoa, whoa," Rove says, stepping away, "Get the fuck off me.I'm no fag." ???, embarrassed, zips himself up.
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Ken Mehlman
Mark Foley
Joe Leiberman
Ann Coulter
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4 Attended by a slithering visage of the globule of evil that forms itself into a vaguely human form every now and again that is ???
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Karl Rove
Don Rumsfeld
Dick Cheney
Desmond Tutu
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5 This was just before Juan Williams, looking on in disgust at the tumescent cock of ???, about to spray a concupiscent Chris Wallace with neocon jizz.
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Stephen Hadley
Paul Wolfowitz
Bill Kristol
Jon Coyners
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6 Yep, in ??? untrained teachers use tax dollars to "teach" Christian belief and nutzoid fundamentalist bullshit.
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Texas
South Dakota
Kansas
Tehran
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7 These actions caused ??? to remove Bush's balls from his mouth long enough to say,

Joe Leiberman
Joe Leiberman
Joe Leiberman
Jim Webb
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8 So fuck ??? just another tiny-dicked fucker who abused his power and position in obeisance to a sublimated libido that Republican politics would not allow to run rampant and free.
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Randy Cunningham
Mark Foley
Tom DeLay
Big Dog
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9 Most people aren't paying attention, and when they turn on CNN or Fox, no ones telling them that ??? rapes hobo corpses after beating them to death with beagle puppies.
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Sam Alito
Dick Cheney
Bill Frist
Steve Irwin (RIP)
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10 ???, that strange, sad little man who fucks for money but refuses to call himself a "whore" Said, "Frankly I'd prefer to spend our time figuring out ways to bring this very important program of surveillance of potential terrorists here in the United States under the law.
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Joe Leiberman
Joe Leiberman
Joe Leiberman
Nelson Mandella
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11 If any Conservative mongers of cock want to try and defend ??? "Fucking liar" ??? and Fox "News" for its sneak attack on Bill Clinton.
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Neil Cavuto
Shaun Hannity
Chris Wallace
Keith Olberman
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12 Watching ??? "Behold my lipless shit-eating grin".......
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"Cod Piece" Matthews
"Manly Man" Matthews
"Sunny Nobility" Mathews
Lou Dobbs
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13 He's like an adolescent boy who just discovered that jacking off makes him feel good, so he's gonna thwack his dick as often as he can get it up.
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George Bush
Bill O'Reilly
Bill Kristol
Hugh Hefner
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14 "I'm psycho about queers" ??? craw this week is constant faggoty faggots faggoting up the place. I his letter to the super-duper prayer team.
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Tony Perkins
James Dobson
Pat Robertson
Liberace
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15 Which of course, leaves out ??? who's only purpose on earth seems to be keeping big pharma in business.
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Bill Frist
Rick Santorum
Rush Limbaugh
Hippocrates
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Answers Here. Score one for every correct answer.
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13 to 15. You know your rude stuff, but you should really get a life.
10 to 12. Fair play to you.
7 to 9. You must have a life, but quite reasonable.
4 to 6. You definitely have a life.
0 to 3. How sad.
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I shall call this the first quiz of two, but in truth there is enough material for a weekly column.
But the next one won't be as polite.
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5 comments:

Jude said...

Beautiful.

Just beautiful.

Compressed Rudeness. You should market that shit.

iamcoyote said...

Wow, I thought you'd disappeared, I couldn't access the site for a week.

Anyhow, sadly, I have no life, cos I only got one wrong. Who needs a life, anyhow, if you've got rude? Thanks for the fun!

alain said...

Bring it on, dude: straightforward as the GREs, this one was.

Mike V. said...

I didn't get enough of them right.
I must be enjoying the Rudeness too much rather than paying attention!

Good work, BTW.

Peace.

abrupt said...

I also only got one wrong .but I knew I didn`t have a life a long time ago.