Saturday, February 10, 2007

The Big Second Rude Quiz

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More Riotous Repartee of Rudery
The Second Rude Quiz
Of whom does the Rude Pundit speak?

1. "While FRC has not officially endorsed ???? which is not unlike saying, "I'm not sure I like sucking cock" while deep throating a 10-incher. No one can hear you 'cause your mouth's so full of cock.

Joe Leiberman.
Sam Alito.
James Dobson.
Al Gore.

2 ???? is the mistress of ceremonies, with her lips so chapped as if she's sucked so much white conservative cock that she owns stock in Chapstick.

Ann Coulter.
Michelle Malkin.
Peggy Noonan.
Maya Angelou.

3 "Goddamn, I expected to fuck some shit up, but, really, c'mon, who would've thought we'd do this?" as his men around him wiped piss from his lap, shit from his ass, but could do nothing to get that fucking smirk off his face.

Michael Brown.
Bin Laden.
Don Rumsfeld.
Michael Angelo.

4 ???? cunt is a fabulous cunt, all stretched-out and pretty on the cover of Time. A cunt such as ???? is a rare thing for the right. ???? cunt is inviting; its labial lips, the minor ones, you know, whisper invitations, coo to conservatives, "We're wet, oh, so wet, and lubricated, ready for you."

Ann Coulter.
A Dead Person.
Joe Leiberman.
HRH Queen Elisabeth 2nd.

5 ???? stayed bent over when Bush was done with him. Bush walked out quickly and the sound girl asked ???? if he wanted a towel to dry his sticky ass. ???? signalled for her to be quiet as he remembered fondly the grunts and thrusts of the President, hoping that it had been as good for the Commander-in-Chief as it had been for him.

Brit Hume.
Neil Cavuto.
Chris Wallace.
David Letterman.

6 Getting advice from ???? is like a 12 year-old girl asking her elderly uncle who just finished fondling her what he wants for dinner.

Bill kristol.
Michael Brown.
Don Rumsfeld.
Pythagoras.

7 'Cause lately, the vicious she-beast has been practicing cuntistry at such a fevered level that it's like watching humping wolverines.

Michelle Malkin.
Ann Coulter.
Michelle Malkin.
Mother Teresa.

8 ???? demanded that Jeff Gannon fuck him harder as he watched the results coming in from the Ohio Second Congressional District race for the House between Republican Jean "Crazy Fuckin' Eyes Means Crazy Fuckin' Mind" Schmidt and Democrat Paul "I'm an Iraq War Vet - C'mon, Fuck With Me" Hackett. Sweet mercies, ???? cried as Gannon did as he was being paid to do.

Rick Santorum.
Ken Mehlman.
Scotty Baker.
John Wayne.

9 For his part, ???? gone bugfuck insane on the need to get out the values vote. It ain't just about the loss of the Congress. It's about state amendments barring gay unions.

James Dobson.
Rick Santorum.
Pat Robertson.
Sponge Bob Square Pants.

10 Here's how you know you're a worthless fuck as a "news" anchor, an American, and a human being: you work for a "news" network that has been flogging the Michael Jackson trial endlessly, with quite literally hundreds of stories, updates, interviews, and commentaries on whether or not he's the king of poppin' cherries.

Shaun Hannity.
John Gibson.
Tucker Carlson.
Keith Olberman.

11 He's already gone through every goddamn talking point. It's all repetition and shrinking variation from here on out.

Scotty Baker.
George Bush.
Bill Frist.
Charles Bronson.

12 ???? is so pro-war that she keeps vibrators shaped like SA80s, specially made so that when she pulls the trigger, she gets an automatic-weapon sized burst of vibrating speed.

Condi Rice.
Michele Malkin.
Barbara Bush.
Jane Fonda.

13 And, yep, like a good motherfucker, ???? offers support for other motherfuckers: he's for abused wives being forced to tell their motherfucker spouses if they're pregnant, he's for non-whites to have the colour of their skin used as a factor for hiring by motherfuckers, and he believes motherfuckers running colleges can discriminate against the disabled.

Sam Alito.
James Dobson.
Bill Frist.
Dr Mengle.

14 Oh, you know that in the halls of the ???? they broke out the good dildos, the cross-shaped ones, and passed them out to everyone around for a lunch time group clit-tickle to see who can have a vision of Jesus first.

Focus on the Family.
Concerned Women of America
Southern Baptist Wives.
Dykes on Bikes.

15. Bush will introduce his new justices, and how many in that chamber will stand up and applaud? Hey, maybe if ???? remains seated, he can add that to his Democratic cred reel along with his empty vote.

Joe Leiberman.
Joe Leiberman.
Joe Leiberman.
Ted Kennedy.

16 In her increasingly desperate attempt to make herself into some kind of media darling, hideously deformed, incessantly snarling she-beast ???? has been making shitty little videos with crappy commentary and putrescent You Tube-level production values for Hot Air.

Michelle Malkin.
Queen Ann.
Queen Mary.
Queen Victoria.

17 However, ideologically, what ???? said was the rhetorical equivalent of lifting her skirt and declaring, "Fuck you, you pissants, we're motherfuckin' revolutionaries here. Now lick my cunt hard, and I better feel it all the way to the ermine-lined toes of my Ferragamo Baraks."

Laura Bush.
Condi Rice.
Mary Cheney.
Chicks with Dicks.

18 So the majority of the Supreme Court told the Executive Branch that it couldn't ignore the Legislative Branch and just make up laws. Now, as we well know, we're a ???? or two away from the kind of one-party rule that'd make Stalin say, "Goddamn, wish I'd've thought of that."

Joe Leiberman.
Joe Leiberman.
Joe Libeirman.
A Senator from CT.

19 The viscous, shit-smelling goo that forms the life ooze of netherworld evil that pollutes the soil of the earth once again shifted itself into the shape of ???? yesterday when it opened its horrible maw and....

Dick Cheney.
Joe Leiberman.
Dick Cheney.
Joe Leiberman.

20 It was a negotiation as heated as any arms treaty and ended with Merkel licking ???? boots after ???? used Merkel's swagger stick to fuck the Chancellor to world-dominating ecstasy.

George Bush.
Condi Rice.
Laura Bush.
Princess Di.

21 And so it was that ????, oozing the kind of reptilian evil that we expect from the half-men, half-crocodiles that slither from the putrid pools of 41's inner circle,

James Baker.
Don Rumsfeld.
Dick Cheney.
Tinkerbell.

Answers Here.
15 to 21 A Pundit's pundit but you try and vary your reading a tad.
13 to 15. You know your rude stuff, but you should really get a life.
10 to 12. Fair play to you.
7 to 9. You must have a life, but quite reasonable.
4 to 6. You definitely have a life.
0 to 3. How sad.

Enjoy.
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1 comment:

uluro said...

That was great. Have active imagination and can just about picture these scenarios and believe in some cases they just might be true!